Heidi G • Idaho • 27
I went to the bathroom and saw a big brown stain in my underwear. I was so confused. I then felt super ashamed, thinking I hadn't wiped. I thought it was a poop smear! As I grabbed toilet paper and wiped I was horrified to find blood instead. Just like my underwear it was more brown than red. It took me a moment to connect the dots and then I realized it was blood.
I then had to figure out how to use a tampon the same day as my family was going swimming... and I loved swimming. I didn't know how to insert it and my mom just told me to " shove it up there and just take your fingers and push it as far as you can." The tampons were way too big with a cardboard applicator that I accidentally left inserted. I was in so much pain and so uncomfortable I ended up not swimming. I just hid in the locker room and cried.
A few days later I was at my friend's birthday party. My period was super heavy. I had huge Jello like chunks coming out and had to change my pad every thirty minutes. I was nauseated by all the blood and how chunky it was. It has never been that thick and heavy since and I still don't know if that is normal for a first period or not.
In between menstruating I was confused what all the cervical fluid was. My mom said her mother told her that was from thinking dirty thoughts...but didn't offer any other explanation. It wasn't until I was trying to get pregnant that I read in a book about how your cervical fluid helps the sperm travel that I realized my cervical fluid was not a shameful thing.
