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I was 9 years old when I got my 1st period. My mother was in such a state of shock because of my super early periods that she didn't demonstrate to me how to use a pad.
For a really long time, I used to place the sticky side of the pad on my vagina, not on the panty. You can imagine the pain when I used to remove it every time.
My period started when I was 13 and I didn't even know about these M effing demons back then. I got my first period on February 16, 2017.
I had my final exam the next day. I had to take the exam, and I stained the seat (there was a senior sitting next to me, and that senior was a boy).
I was such an anxious child. Nothing about becoming a woman and bleeding out of my vagina for a week, every month, for the next 30 years appealed to me. I had a case of OCD which included a prayer routine I recited every night. Along with many thanks for my family was the BEGGING to not get my period. Not even the man upstairs could stop it though.
I started my period. 7th grade. Was I the only one??? I felt like I was early to the game. Thankfully, my mom had sent me to summer camp a few months before with a huge pack of pads. This, admittedly, sent me into immediate embarrassment and a lot of "uhhh mommmm."
And so the journey begins...WHAT IN THE HECK IS THIS DIAPER!? Is it going to just fall out of my underwear? Am I going to bleed through? To combat this issue I layered underwear over underwear over underwear. I must have looked like a Kardashian.
The must cringe-worthy part of my period story though is the amount of shame I felt. I was becoming a woman! Why did I feel like this was such a terrible thing? I was so ashamed I would roll my pads up, sneak them into my room and put them in a drawer until I could throw them all out when everyone was asleep. Unfortunately, I forgot to throw them out and the cleaning lady found them. I still can't help but hope everyone has forgotten that incident.
I hope that by sharing my story and just talking about and saying the words "Period.Period.Period," that the stigma will lessen and no other beautiful, young woman will feel shamed but proud.
